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WE HAVE SCHOOLS FOR
ALL AGES AND INTERESTS

Our schools boast top-ranking state athletes and scholars, including national competitors in the "Destination Imagination", the Johns Hopkins gifted and talented program, the National Geographic and Spelling Bees, and the Math Olympiad.

Orcas Island School District www.orcasislandschools.org
Orcas Island Christian School www.oics.org
Orcas Montessori School 360-376-5350
Salmonberry School
Skagit Valley College - San Juan Islands Center

And look into the Lifelong Learning Program offered by the Orcas Island Public Library, which won the Washington State Library's Association's 2002 "Advancement in Services" award for this program.

Commencement Speech
Orcas Island High School Graduation 2005
By Jim Bredouw

When I was about your age, I would leave my home in Seattle and visit my dad who lived in L.A. for one week every summer. He worked at this cool place called Universal Studios so, while at work, he would sometimes get me into the sound scoring stage where they’d let me quietly watch movies being scored. These film composers would stand at a podium and conduct a hundred of the best studio musicians in the world. Being a self taught high school guitar player of average ability who couldn’t write or read music, you can imagine how what these guys did truly seemed like rocket science to me – writing these multiple parts on very long paper all of which had to match exact points in the picture all seemed to verge on the impossible.

Somehow, though, with equal doses of naiveté, arrogance, ambition, enthusiasm, luck and the help of great mentors like my old friend Martin Lund, who’s sitting over there and actually taught me how to write music 30 years ago, I was standing on a podium myself in Hollywood just 10 years later, conducting many of the same musicians whom I had seen in my teenaged years. The session was an unmitigated disaster but eventually I learned from my experiences and lived to tell the tale. I tell you this story for two reasons:

One, to suggest to you that in the space of just a few years, you can do things that you may have once thought impossible – in fact, I think of a particularly diminutive 6th grader named Hunter Easterling who, just 6 short years later became one of a handful of the premiere football players in our state – probably thanks to an equal dose of naiveté, arrogance, enthusiasm, and the help of great mentors. The second reason for this story is to tell you that I actually do believe in what you hear at most graduations about believing in yourself, following your dreams, reaching for the stars -- all that stuff.

But what I would like to talk about today has less to do with big dreams and more to do with the stuff that goes on inside – our self image and behaviors and perceptions. I think of “big dreams” as the map that one references occasionally on a road trip but what I’d like to talk about today as more akin to actually “driving the car”, which is what we spend most of our time doing. I know some of this will sound foreign to you because I didn’t even get most of this until I was somewhere between 20 and 50 but, then I figured you asked an old guy to speak because he might have learned a thing or two since high school.

So here are my ten suggestions of valuable things I wish I’d known when I was 18:

The first one is the shortest: Get plenty of sleep and drink lots of water. Believe it or not, simple things like adequate rest and hydration can make an enormous difference in how the world looks and feels to you – I’m not joking.

Second, it is amazing how many thousand of pounds of stress in our short, precious lifetimes that we impose voluntarily that are completely avoidable. Being in debt and being late are two of the most common. Ninety-five percent of the time, these are completely avoidable stresses. With the possible exceptions of an education and a modest home and car, there is almost never a need to borrow money from anyone and this includes VISA cards. If you can’t afford it, don’t buy it – simple.

And unless your water heater explodes or your car doesn’t start, there is almost never a good reason to be late. Leave early and drive in the slow lane with the old people and trucks. Life is going to deal you plenty of unavoidable and unexpected situations ranging from inconvenient to tragic so why not make it as easy as you can by following these simple steps: Don’t go into debt and be a little early everywhere you go. Contrary to popular perception, you will never be without something to do or think about if you arrive someplace too early and you’ll be much more relaxed when you get there.

Third, be really accomplished at at least one thing. It doesn’t matter whether it makes money or not. It doesn’t matter if it’s baking a great peach pie or rebuilding engines or riding horses or practicing medicine. You’re going to learn how to do hundreds of new things in your life but take at least one of them, whether it’s a job or a hobby and stick with it beyond just a casual understanding all the way to true expertise. Becoming known for being outstanding at something is great but even better is the inner knowledge that you’ve actually earned the distinction.

Fourth, some of you may remember Richie Moore from The Funhouse. Before his untimely passing, one of the many wisest things Richie imparted to me was “What you think of me is none of my business”. The way people view other people or react to events or situations has much more to do with how they were raised or what they have experienced in their own lives than it has to do with you. So don’t take other’s opinions too much to heart. We each have a unique blend of logic, rationalization, fears, memories, joys and broken hearts that cause truly objective judgment to be virtually unheard of in the human experience. In fact, I actually learn more about myself when I examine the people or things about which I am most critical.

Which brings me to my fifth and most complex, long-winded subject: Judgment in general. Sometime, try taking a look at how often judgmental language is used. And I don’t just mean negative judgment – just judgments in general. This one’s tricky because we, as a culture, are so filled with judgment that it seems almost abnormal not to judge. We have a president who calls entire nations evil and nations calling him evil right back and TV shows consumed with telling you what’s good and bad, obsessed with sticking their noses into any rabbit hole in the world hoping to pump it dry purely for its ability to shake us up from our overstimulated & desensitized brains. I don’t like weather people telling me that sunny days are “good” and rainy days are “bad”. It sometimes seems that if you don’t have a strong opinion about virtually everything that you’re perceived as either ignorant or weak.

At Orcas High I would guess that hardly a paragraph goes by without at least a couple of judgment words like: that sucks, that’s awesome, cool, retarded, hot, stupid, my personal least favorite “that’s so gay”, and of course the now famous “IDIOT”. And, of course, we adults are not much better. We may be more clever in our ability to hide our judgments in words that seem civil and reasoned but I really can’t think of anyone other than maybe Jesus Christ who was truly willing to live and let live. So what’s the alternative? Two things:

First, ask yourself, is this remotely my business? If somebody is telling lies about your family or drives their car over your foot, this is your business. But 95% of it isn’t. The way somebody chooses to dress? What they value, what they eat, how much they weigh, who they go out with? What they do with their money? Their sexual orientation? The kind of car they drive? None of your beeswax.

Second, try just saying how you feel about something. Some examples are: “I don’t like it when my boss speaks to me that way”; “I love the way the ground smells after it rains”; “I wish you wouldn’t interrupt me when I’m speaking” These can be said with passion, even anger, but they are without judgment; they simply describe the way you feel and nobody gets to dispute that. It is a huge burden lifted when you are not the arbiter of everything. Just quietly observe and let things exist without having to write a position paper on all of it – there’s one gigantic psychic homework assignment that you don't have to do ever .. again.

Number six! You are hereby granted permission to freely blame your parents for any shortcoming that you may have. That’s right -- they not only gave you those crappy genes that made your eyesight bad and your hair thin and your boobs too small and your skin break out but they also either gave you way too much praise or not nearly enough praise or were overbearing or never around or in God knows how many ways, did a piss poor job of raising you, which is now the primary reason that you have most of the problems that you have. So go wild -- tell anyone who will listen that they screwed you up and there’s really nothing you can do about it -- it is simply not your fault.

But there is one caveat. You only have permission to use your parents as fall guys until you are 22 years of age, 23 tops and then you must take complete responsibility for your own physical, mental and ethical realities because you see at that point, they get to simply blame your grandparents and you can see where this will lead. In no time, we’re right back to Adam and Eve or the tadpole emerging from the slime depending on your religious orientation. In either case, I’m pretty sure that neither Adam, Eve NOR the tadpole will accept responsibility for your imbalanced check book, messy apartment, the size of your thighs nor the realization that you really aren’t as good a singer as your friends tell you.

The truth is, there’s usually no one on this planet who has worked harder for you or who’s loved you as much as your parents even if they sometimes aren’t completely sure how to show you. But of course, that’s probably their parents’ fault. And news flash kids -- you don’t get to replace them with a boyfriend or girlfriend who takes their place in the “you’ve ruined my life” game, as they are even less responsible for how you turned out than your folks. So have fun with this for a few years but after that, it’s your TV show.

Celebrating Seniors Suggestion seven: The vast majority or people you may run into who you may see as arrogant or mean are simply insecure. They’re afraid of something, quite possibly you, and what they think about you is, well, none of your business. But there’s a fun, magic trick that you can play with these people. If you, unbeknownst to them, address their actual fear with insight and kindness rather than address their behavior with argument, poof! They become nicer and you become greatly admired. It’s your choice -- you can argue and get down in the dirt and feel conflicted and not sleep well, if that sounds more appealing to you. Or, while it’s not always easy, if you can muster up the spiritual strength to look past their gnarling teeth into their damaged souls, you will almost always come out with a more satisfying resolution. And by the way, just because an individual believes that they have power that you don’t have, they are almost always wrong. Authority is usually an illusion sold to an individual or culture that wants it. And on that subject, don’t let false patriots intimidate you either -- our fore fathers, the ultimate patriots who actually laid down their fortunes and very lives to create this remarkable country, saw debate about issues as paramount to a successful democracy. So don’t let anyone on the right or the left try to shut you up or intimidate you – your opinion doesn’t have to fit into anyone’s ideology. Truths are not mutually exclusive of other truths.

And on a lighter note, Number eight: Girls, don’t marry a man with the idea of “fixing him”. We’re not fixable. We can be trained for simple tasks to a small degree but if we’re slobs who watch too much TV and think turning our underwear inside out is the definition of good hygiene, or if we’re retentive neat freaks who say “hang on a sec, hon” cause we’re documenting our jogging times and resting heart rates, that probably won’t change too much as time passes. So, pick us carefully for what you see is what you’ll get.

And boys, don’t marry a woman who you expect to be a saint and hotel maid by day and part of yet a different service industry by night. It doesn’t work that way and believe it or not, while you’re ok, you simply are not that fascinating, attractive and innately worthy as to be treated as a crowned head simply because you’re you. Women can be infinitely patient and usually far brighter than we are but don’t push your luck – they can marry trophy spouses too.

And for any you who may now know or might discover later that you’re not heterosexual, one; all of these lessons still apply to you as well and, two; I would like to apologize in advance that much of America still thinks that sexual preference is something that you arbitrarily pick like the color of your contact lenses. It isn’t.

Suggestion nine: Don’t be afraid to be lonely. Practice being alone. Take yourself on a date, walk in the woods, go to a museum, make yourself a nice meal. You may feel a little lonely at first if you’re not surrounded by friends but on the other side of loneliness is a state of grace that can give you more confidence and make you a better spouse, parent and friend.

And finally, in closing, to wrap up, to conclude, I would like to put in my pitch in defense of your brain. Your brain is one of the most wondrous inventions on this planet, along with Tivo and ipods of course. It has a carefully wired system of logic, function and a truly kick ass reward system that is hard to beat when it doles out secreted drops of dopamine and endorphins under certain circumstances and there is simply no better rush. How do we get these great drugs? Two ways – by earning them or by self-medication. How can you earn them? Many ways -- by seeing your garden produce its first flower or by getting off your butt and moving it or by doing a good deed or writing a song. t can come from trying something different like walking laps around the ferry deck at night or planning a trip to a place you’re never been or driving your parent’s riding lawn mower to Eastsound in the middle of the…no, maybe not that one. Anyway, these are the drugs that give us a feeling of being alive and of well-being.

Or, like a tyrant with a whip, you can artificially force this magnificent organ to spin its gold like a battered slave cowering in the corner of your arbitrary will, unrelated to any kind of deserving effort. This is accomplished to one degree or another when we dose ourselves with too many hits of either caffeine, TV, crystal meth, sugar, weed, whites and wine, porn, TV or pain killers. We imaginative humans, in an effort to anesthetize, amp up, chill out or just get a quick buzz are infinitely creative in figuring out how to ingest, snort, inject or patch it in to our grey matter. ‘Just say no’ didn’t start in the 20th century – it’s been going on since the first caveman chewed his first coca leaf. The problem is if the brain thinks you’re in charge of the dopamine drip, it stops giving it to you unless you self medicate so you feel sort of sort of low and bummed out if you don’t get your fix of chronic or Starbuck’s or Krispy Kremes. The laws of the land may make a distinction between these substances, but your brain doesn’t. So take it easy on the additives – earn your highs and go easy on your beautiful mind -- it’s the only one you get.

And be kind to yourselves. There are plenty of people, magazines and institutions that are ready to make you feel like you’re just not quite enough. They’re wrong. You are enough. You are more than enough and with a little effort, faith, original thought, belief in your instincts and innate kindness, you will be amazed at what you will get done in this gift that we call life. So good luck, stay in touch and be sure to let us all know how you’re doing from time to time. Especially your parents. Love you guys.

Over $37,000 awarded to 2004 Orcas Island School Graduates From "The Islands Sounder," June 16 2004